


John and Luan Are Friends

by PrinnyRamza



Series: Serfs [1]
Category: Homestuck, The Loud House (Cartoon)
Genre: Crossover, Friendship, Gen, Time Skips
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-20
Updated: 2017-07-20
Packaged: 2018-12-04 07:26:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,080
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11550369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PrinnyRamza/pseuds/PrinnyRamza
Summary: They met when she was 10 and he was 8. Than there was a party when she was 14 and he was turning 13.





	John and Luan Are Friends

**Author's Note:**

> Crossovers are fun.

“Oh man that was great.” he wiped an imaginary tear from his eye, no doubt exhausted from laughing at his own trickery. 

And if Luan was being honest normally she would’ve appreciated the humor of the situation and at the time of the ‘event’ she did have a laugh though that was from surprise more than anything else, but now she was confused more than anything. She still gave a polite chuckle. 

She couldn’t allow a prankster’s hard work go without appreciation. She held too much respect for the craft.

He leaned towards her. One eye on her expression the other eyeing the door between them. “You saw their faces right?”

“Don’t know why they got so mad. I think they ended up with a pretty sweet deal.” she managed to get out and cringed internally almost instantly. Normally she wouldn’t care but that one was bad even by her standards.

Safe to say that she was surprised when she heard a snort in returned. “Good one.”

The kid gave a bright smile and she caught sight of large front teeth similar to her own. He resume his fit, leaning his head back as he was enveloped in laughter. The only thing stopping his cranium was the back of the seat he was in and the wall behind said chair.

“Mr Egbert, pipe it down out there.” a growling voice came from the confines of the door making the two youths jump. 

‘Egbert’ as Luan now knew him as coughed trying to downplay the intensity of his cheering. 

“I’m John by the way.” he spoke a bit quieter, not a whisper but just quiet enough that the big man begin the door wouldn’t bother scolding them.

“Luan Loud.” she said, intending to prove her namesake. 

“I know”

The girl tilted her head.

“Like I wouldn’t. Your family is huge and they make a scene everywhere. Anarchy. Pandemonium. Living legends.” Luan found the amount of awe that John displayed for her family strange. Luan loved them but she didn’t think they were anything special. 

She wasn’t going to deny a fan however. Even one that did her a solid. “I am an agent of chaos.”

The boy smiled “I’ve heard the April Fools day stories. So cool.”

“So is that why?” she pointed her thumb the vague direction of the cafe. At least she thought it was somewhere in the direction over her shoulder.

“Those guys were being assholes. That wasn’t cool at all.” he rubbed his neck. “You probably would’ve got around to it but I had the opportunity and no prankster worth his salt would pass that up.”

She could understand that. A trickster had to trick. If they did some good on the way then that was only better. She smiled, showing off the braces.

“Besides” he added “Got to keep up my prankster gambit.” 

She immediately lost track of the conversation. “The whip cream was a good choice.”

“Shaving cream actually. Had to improvise.”

 

“Hey Luan, I can’t believe that you’ve never checked out Face Off before.” John spoke to the door. The same one he hadn’t yet bother to knock. There was the doorbell located just to the ring which had also been ignored as the bucktooth preteen gathered his thoughts.

He had gotten the call a few moments ago. His friend was insistent on a spontaneous movie session and John wasn’t going to pass one up, even if the phone call did wake him up after a long day chatting online. 

He was tired, even standing at the door he let out a yawn that he suppressed with the back of his palm. He would say that he regretted the constant bombardment of psychoanalysis, irony and adventure that comes packed with knowing his online friends, considering that he would impact the day with his offline friend but that would be a lie. He wouldn’t miss a moment of tomfoolery whether it was physical or through the veil of the internet. His pestering chums on pesterchum were as important as the girl who lived the street to him.

The only thing he would regret is that there wasn’t always enough hours in the day to do both. 

John finally pulled together his consciousness to muster the wit to push in the doorbell. This task proved to be a bit too much for him and that he had to discard his dvd on the welcome mat. 

He allowed the chime play as he bent down to retrieve the movie. The boy’s crawled towards the casing and he hear a collection of thumps. 

He paused.

DVD in hand, he stood back up. There was a buzzing in the back of his skull gifted from his lineage as a Ebert. A trickster sense if you will. He didn’t have to search hard for the first evidence of tomfoolery. 

Right in front of him, the front door was splatter of an unknown green substance. John ran his finger against it. Paint. 

There was some lumps amongst the door’s recent coating. Paintballs. 

John spun and crouched into covered. He had to move out of range of the potential assault. Those pellets were aimed at the him or at least the door and whoever would ring the doorbell. His clumsy hands had saved him from not only the laundry cycle but a lost of reputation as a trickster and a few notches on his prankster gambit. 

Prankster.

What day was it? 

His phone slipped out of his pocket and he lit up the screen. April 1st. 

He suddenly knew that he had indeed fell right into a trap. 

It could only be one person. April Fools was the jester’s delight and there was only one such jester at this house. 

He briefly consider his odds. His initiation idea would be to make a tactical retreat and resupply back home with his only assortment of trickery. That could however have been factored in as far as he knew. Luan was not one who usually missed. There was the chance that she had factored in his little slip up. A scare tactic, one where when he panicked and tried to escape would instead lead him directly to a much more diabolical contraption. 

Plus even if she had not expected the miscalculation than she would have seen her failure and no doubt be ready for round two. Meaning that escape wasn’t an option. 

Well he guessed it was time to trigger some traps.

Luan was somewhere inside the house and he knew for a fact that she had the whole place wired. Any missed opportunities she would witness and attempt to correct. One missed prank wouldn’t bother her too much if she was sure that ten others would hit you, but if he disarmed a dozen then she’ll definitely sneak around to make sure she’ll get her target. 

She’ll be away from her surveillance system than. Without the protection and near omniscience her security gave her, she’ll be vulnerable for his counter attack. 

So that left one question: Was he a bad enough dude to drag her out of her room?

He nodded to himself.

There was a open window which he crawled underneath. He tested the weight of his phone, before launching the device through the opening. A bit extreme but it was what he had on him and his father as a single member of a pranking family would understand why it’ll have to be replaced. 

After the initial crash, there was a wet oozing sound that started to emit from inside the house followed by what Egbert could only guess was a none too pleased chicken. He took that as a signal that he had made the correct move. 

He took a deep breath before he jumped in and his mission began. 

 

A tall blonde teen opened the front door.

“Hey Luan, your boyfriend is here.” she sanged out.

“Lori, he’s not my boyfriend.” Luan mocked her sister, puncturing her sentence with a frown. 

The sibling simply rolled her eyes and brought attention back to her phone and the person on the other end of a sizable chat. 

John stood there not looking bothered by all and she shouldn’t be surprised. He must’ve heard that call dozens of times over at this point.

“Hey you guys cleaned everything up already.” he looked around in amazement. The reminder caused Luan to chuckle as she briefly relived last April Fool's Day. The battle between them left not only the two of them a mess but appeared to nearly have destroyed the house once the dust had settled and her family came out of hiding. 

“Please John, it’s been two weeks. That might’ve been much for you but over here that’s another tuesday.” she neglected to mentioned that a few select siblings might still have twitches as a result of being caught in the crossfire of their trickster war. It was probably not worth speaking about. They only came up when there was a particularly loud noise. So when anyone who lived here did anything really. 

“Ready for movie night?” Underneath his arm was a collection of movies which he had sworn that she would love but consider that he was basing this in his own tastes...well... 

“As ready as I’m ever going to be.” That was technically true, though it didn’t give the message that she was excited about the night.

There was a crash and Luan knew exactly where it was coming from. The young prankster wasn’t bother by loud noises, that was a requirement in her line of work but she swore that one day Luna was going to knock the hinges off their door. 

“Oh is that Luna?” John looked upstairs in the direction that he guessed the rockstar was residing. 

“Who else could it be?” Luan answered with a sigh that one who didn’t know the girl would rarely hear. 

“Wait one second. I gotta check something out real quick.” John dumped his collection onto the couch before ascending the staircase. He didn’t think twice about barging right into her room. 

When the music stopped suddenly, Luan could hear the boy shout, “I knew it was that song.”

“No way dude, you know this?”

As she followed she stepped on one of the many sheets of music that cluttered the ground traveling all the way to her sister sitting comfortably on a beanbag chair, ax in hand. Her friend stood up, holding a single page.

“Man, I wish I had my piano close by.”

Luna put aside her guitar as she rose, “Oh I have a keyboard round here. You can totally jam on that.”

She turned to Luna, “Sis, why didn’t you tell me you know someone who rocked?”

The rocker girl stuck a hand underneath her bed and presented John with an instrument.

John shrugged, “I’m actually way more of a classic guy, but If I feel like playing something, I play it.”

“I can dig it.” Luna nodded. 

He fumbled the keys in his arms before falling back onto Luan’s bed and stationing it onto his lap. He tested some keys. Listening closely to how they sounded as he hit each note. He then took the sheet that he was just holding and laid it out to his side before moving onto the song that Luna had just been playing.

“Pretty good” Luna started to fiddle with her own weapon of choice, “Pretty good.”

Luan groaned, suspecting that the night might end up going a different but no less dull direction then she had expected. Still she didn’t know that he played an instrument before and she was no critic but he sounded good or at least he sounded like he meant to play every note that he played. That each key went into the next. That meant he was good, right? 

An hour had passed; a whole hour before she was able to drag John back to the planned event. It was almost like he was Luna’s friend instead of her’s. 

“Come on. I can’t wait to get to the first stinker.” she said as she with her maxed out stealth skill, placed a whoopee cushion onto John’s designated seat. 

“I can tell you that I present nothing but cinematic classics.” He picked up two of his movies and weighed the options between them before choosing one. 

Luan sat down.

John sat down.

Lucy spoke, “What are you guys watching?”

Luan yelped.

John yelped.

“I’m pretty sure I signed up for a movie night, not a movie fright.” Luan relaxed into the couches. 

“I can’t believe I fell for a whoopee cushion.” Egbert pulled the offending object from underneath him, “That’s like the oldest trick in the book. So lame.”

He gave her a glare, no doubt already planning his revenge before turning to her sister, “Of course the undebated classic, Ghostbusters 2.”

“Is this the one where some misfits gather together and capture the supernatural echoes of once living souls?” Lucy said in her usual neutral tone.

“Yup basically.” John confirmed.

“I’m conflicted. On one hand I’m not sure if I can approve of the blatant disrespect of the dead, but on the implied suffering that their souls must go through as they are trapped in their metal prisons draws me closer.” if she was actually conflicted Luan couldn’t tell. 

“Oh right” Realization was alive in John’s eyes, “Luan told me that you were into all that supernatural stuff. You know I know a girl loves that stuff too.”

He did?

Lucy faced her friend and just stared, scanning him, “And are you?”

John blinked.

“Into that sorta stuff, I mean.” Lucy explained.

He flashed a smile, “Of course. Well mostly cause of the genius of Bill Murray, but I also got some paranormal books lying around. Man if I could see a ghost or be a ghost. That’ll be so cool.”

“You know I do know a few rituals-” Lucy started.

Luan groaned. It seemed like there was going to be another delay in their plans. At least this time she’ll have something to do. Trying to keep Lucy from turning him into a blood sacrifice or whatever will keep her busy.

 

There was a knock on the door. So of course John answered.

He gripped the handle, twisted it and pulled it open. He then looked outside and then immediately shut it back closed. 

There was knock at the door. This time John ignored it. He had way more important things to deal with, like his late breakfast for example, a bowl of delicious oats and marshmallow treats.

A third knock on the door and his dad answered it. He whined knowing that there was absolutely no way that his parental figure would allow pandora’s box to be closed. 

“Hey Luan, how are things?” John’s dad reached out to shake the hand out to the preteen girl. 

“Great Mister Egbert.” Come on Luan, don’t take his hand. It’s a joybuzzer. John knew this and you knew this. 

Beside the common sense of a jokester the girl did take the hand and she gave a small cry followed by snorting laughter. “Just clowning around.”

John usually enjoyed the sharp wit behind the well constructed wordplay that his friend deployed but at this very moment it served only to emphasize the currently unwanted situation. 

Luan was spotting a big rainbow flo, a polka dot tie and humongous red ball stuck to the tip of her schnoz. 

She was dressed like a clown and if the last thing that John felt was needed in his household was another clown. The only saving grace was that at least she was of a different time period then the harlequins that his father insisted on decorating their home with, but a clown was still a clown either way. 

“Why?” he could only ask. The response he got was a simple ‘honk.’ 

“Why?” he repeated again. She had known of his disdain for the profession, believing them to be the bottom rung of the comedy food chain. 

He refused to continue to acknowledge her. He was one for folly but no lunacy was worth having to degrade his refined sense of humor with this clowning. 

He took a bite from his cereal. Luan drew a horn right from her of her many pockets and blew the tool right into his ear. He chewed the grain, slowing down only when a marshmallow treat came between his maul. Water shot out of a seltzer bottle, splashing from from the side of his cheek. It went everywhere, even mixing in with his milk but he just kept on eating anyway.

“Hey could you get me something from the cupboard? Thanks.” He spoke as if there wasn’t an monstrosity standing in the middle of his kitchen. 

The minstrel sighed, rejected and went onto her tippy toes as she reached upwards. 

John had original saves this idea for his father but he had to keep Luan busy before she gained her second win.

“Honey badger” there was a scream and a hiss.

John turned in his chair and brought the cereal to his lap, giving himself audience to the sudden strife. His friend wrestle the wild animal as it did it’s best to potentially consume his friend. 

He took another spoonful of oats and laughed, “Honey badger.” 

 

“So haven’t been here since we had to clean up those badger bites.” Luan didn’t even need the memory of that. It didn’t help that she was dress the same manner then that incident. She however didn’t hold a grudge considering that it was a tactic that she employed during April Fools against her siblings. 

She, instead of responding, scrolled through a joke site on her phone. It was an important for a jokester to research for inspiration. 

Dressing up in her clown getup was something that she had done for Lisa’s birth and the twins’ and she was going to keep up the tradition for the newest addition to her family, but that didn’t mean that she was excited with sitting out in the hospital waiting room as the doctors took care of her mom’s contractions. 

Her siblings were in agreement and mostly minding their own business. Even Lisa. While this was her first time bearing witness to a baby being born, Lisa never really got excited about much of anything and instead usually stare curiously at things that caught her eye.

She laid in Leni’s lap as her oldest sister read a book to her, though it looked like the blonde had much more difficulty than the two year old did.

The only one who looked nervous was John. To be fair that could have to do less with the miracle of life and more with the fact that he probably felt out of place with being witness to such an intimate familial event.

He was at the house when her mother’s water broke. He didn’t leave to far away, enough that he could walk but it was already dark outside when the baby decided to come. They couldn’t let him go out at this time despite his insistence that he’ll be alright and with the apparently immediacy of the birth they couldn’t swing by his home so he just had to come along. 

All he could do now was kick his feet back and forth. 

Luan didn’t look away from her phone “Hey is your dad on his way?” 

The glasses wearing boy thumbed through his phone, “He said that he’s running a bit late. Things are a bit swamped at work.” 

“What does your dad do again?” 

“Street performer.”

Right, he wishes. 

Then again, she wished. That would actually be pretty cool. That would be really cool. If that happened she would trade in her right arm for an apprenticeship. 

It was unlikely thought. Never has she seen a performer in a suit and tie outside of a movie or award show. 

“Hey if you stay long enough you might be able to see the baby.” 

“Ya?” John didn’t look sure if he wanted to see them or not. 

“It’s nothing like in the movies. They’re covered in all this goo. You have to check it out.” Luan went into detail. She for a moment thought that maybe if her friend was excited then she could get excited too. 

Instead John wrinkles his nose. “Gross, that’s weird. I think I’ll be good without.” 

“I didn’t think you would shy away from gross out humor.”

“I’m reserve to have taste.”

Luan wasn’t at all convinced. “You once gave me a bottle of apple juice that you pissed in.”

It was notable for being one of the few times that Luan actual was angry at being on the receiving end of a joke. 

“I was paying respect for Howie Mandel and his classic performance in Little Monsters.” 

“You really need to start watching better movies.”

Her friend actually looked a little bit insulted, “From the girl who made me see Patch Adams.”

“It’s an underappreciated work of art.” say it isn’t and she will fight you.

“It was shit and your taste is shit.” the boy laughed. 

There was a quick jab to his side causing the buckteeth boy to flinch just on reflex. On his other side was an older blonde who didn’t look to please.

Lori looked up from her phone, glaring at the kid, “Hey can’t you cut it out. If I hear Lisa or like the twins saying stuff like that I might just have to strangle you.”

“Haha sorry.” John scratched through his hair. 

The two friends suddenly found their respective laps very interesting. 

Luan silently uttered a curse of her own. Not only were things back to being as uneventful as ever but John was once again quiet. She didn’t like that. It was so much unlike considering that normally compared to her the guy was a complete chatterbox. That was compared to her, Miss queen talks-a-lot. 

Seeing her friend not blasting off about something was just weird at this point.

“Psssshhh” she whispered and he turned to her. She stuck out her thumb, “Did you bring any cash with you?” 

John ended up in the giftshop in front of a stack of stuff animals. Luan chatted with the cashier who seemed amused at the clown dressed girl.

Luan stuffed a plushie in a provided black shopping bag before turning back to her pal, “Ready.” 

“Ya cool. So what did you get?” He tried to looked through the plastic but all that could be made out was that it was soft and lumpy. 

“You’ll find out.” Luan waved him off. “So what’s up?”

“Hey you have a lot of siblings right?” John had chosen that day to state the obvious. 

“Mom and dad would disagree but right.” Luan however secretly suspected that this particular child was however a result of stealing what she had at the time assumed were single wrapped balloons. 

“So how is it?”The boy asked, “Like I imagined it was this kind of tough relationship where you yell at each other and then end up hugging while a studio audience ‘aws’ at the whole thing.”

She had bit trouble following his thought pattern, and she only ended more confused when it added, "I might be guessing at this base on ‘Sister Sister’.” 

She could however take a guess on what he was asking her, “John, you’ve seen my sisters. You know what it’s like.”

“Ya but knowing someone’s sister and having a sister must be a bit different. I would think. I don’t really know don’t really have a sister and it’s not like I’m going to get one anytime soon.” he rubbed his neck, “Not unless another meteor end up conventionally drops from the sky.”

Okay there went any normalcy in the conversation. 

There must’ve been a look on her face because John intercepted her question, “Oh that’s what my dad told me. Apparently I dropped from a raging comet.” 

“If I ever have kids I think I’ll used that story.” Luan wasn’t lying, that was much better than the old tired storks story, “That or burrowed through a man’s chest.” 

“I wished for you from a magic Zoltar machine.” John suggested.

The two shared a laugh. 

Luan handed him the black bag, “Hey we don’t wanna miss that sucker pop out. Come on.” 

“Why you’re handing this to me?”

“It’s your gift to them.” If he was stuck here then it was probably better if he felt like he was contributing something

She watched as he overturned the black plastic and dump the present onto his palm. He caught a small brown rabbit. 

His expression was pure joy and she knew that it must’ve been hard for to calm himself and put on his ‘acting face’,

“I bought a present for you Casey.” he quoted his favorite film, ConAir. Known to Luan as the movie that she’s seen so many times that she now hated. 

  


“Oh cool Luan, you’re making, like a fort or something?” The Loud backyard was covered in prywood. The boards mostly surrounding the fourth daughter of the Loud linage. 

There were blueprints spread out in front of her. Not too surprising of a sight. John has seen Luan planning out some of her more elaborate traps and they often required careful planning even though she liked to make her family think that all her pranks are spur of the moment “Nope, we’ll working my stage.”

John let out a confused hum. 

“Hey Luan, I brought down that fabric you wanted.” a perky voice came from within the house Luan’s older sister walked out. Leni threw down some cloth.

“Leni’s helping me. Shes good with her hands.” Luan explained. 

John knew that. In fact there were a few statuettes in his house that his father had commissioned from the fashionista. Much to John’s displeasure. “You’re making a stage?” 

Luan nodded and made an adjustment with a quick stroke of a pencil to her plans. 

“You’re performing?” 

“Ya. Well I want to.” she stopped any development to nervously draw eights in the corner of the blue construction paper. 

“Oh, when?” 

“I don’t know. Forever?” She flipped over the construction paper. On the back there were many words and fonts spread out. Most of them unreadable thanks to the clearly vicious strikes of the pen. There was one near the corner that she pointed out to him. ‘Funny Business Inc.’  
“I want to do some parties.”

Luan straightened the sheet with her indexes and thumb, “And I’m going to start soon. There’s one of my mom’s patients. He’s having a root canal and he mentioned that his son is having a party. Mom mentioned me. Mention that I could maybe go over entertain everyone and I said yes”

She flipped the plans back over so that the dimensions of the stage were facing up again. 

It sounded cool. There was no doubt that Luan would be a hit. She was funny and good at planning, anyone who knew her knew that. 

It was good to see her making that step. 

John never really put forth that effort. He wasn’t lazy and he pursued his hobbies passionately but he had told people that he did want to be a comedy when he was older. It was a idea that he had since he could first read his father’s copy of Colonel Sassacre’s Daunting Text. One of many possible career paths. Pianist had been another and there was a time where he had entertained the notion of being a ghostbuster. 

He had never told anyone that last one and rejected it because of how ridiculous it was. Comedian was something that he could really see himself doing, but it was something that he didn’t think he could do now. He was just a kid after all. 

Luan was really going ahead with it. 

John took and stepped forward and lifted one of the boards, plopping it up next to him, “Do you need any help? I’m great with a hammer.” 

Luan smiled and pointed some directions out to him.

John nodded and got to work, “but we should totally make a fort later.” 

 

“Hey Luan, is your sis in?” She never really thought that the sight of John could be so annoying.

“Jamming again?” He carried, wrapped in a rag, a keyboard. One that was his own. He told her that he asked his dad to buy it for him. Easier than hauling a piano around, he argued. He also told her that his dad countered by telling him it wouldn’t have been ‘that’ much easier, but either way the tie wearing man had caved in. 

It made sense to her why he would suddenly ask for a new keyboard. After all he was hanging out with Luna so often lately it was like he was her friend instead of Luan’s.

“Ya I just wanted her to check something out real quick.”

Of course Luan didn’t stop him. There wasn’t really much that she could do that would. It wasn’t like she had the authority to turn him away, he would champion through any trickery and when it came to physical strength, John was straight out stronger than her despite being almost two years her junior. Hell the twelve year old would probably give any of her sister’s a run for their money. Most importantly she couldn’t morally stop her friend from having a good time even if she was completely discluded from it. 

Luan instead stepped aside and forced a smile. She kept it there until she heard that he cleared the top step. 

She didn’t feel like going up to the room that she and Luna shared. 

The prankster sighed. 

Guess she did have things around that she could be doing. Change the tapes of her cameras, get some cards printed out and confirm a few parties. 

Mostly things that she was meaning to do anyway for her business. It was still small. She was only thirteen after all, but she did have a few clients. Even if they were only some neighbors her parents were friends with. 

Those activities didn’t last long however, ending with her not having a good excuse to avoid her room other then maybe watching tv. It helped that the television was unoccupied with the notable exception of her father who was infamously known as being a little bit of a pushover when it came to his kids.

They watched a comedy special of course, though Luan couldn’t tell you which one. She couldn’t hear the intro over the noise upstairs. Each note the two musicians seem to play blocked her from enjoying each joke and whenever the crowd on the television cheered it seemed more for them then the comedian on screen. She couldn’t even say that the music they were making was bad. Though a bit different than what Luna usual plays. 

With the music playing she couldn’t watch her show so she made herself as comfortable as possible, curling up into a corner of the couch. She was relaxed another to take a nap with the tv remote entangles in her arms. 

She woke up to someone pushing against her arm. Someone was trying to wake her. She kicked in the air where she guessed that the person was. “Hey dude.” 

Luan blinked, trying to get the sandman’s sleep powder out of her eyes. 

“Sorry, know that you were taking a good snoozer.” It was Luna, “You were doing that thing where you laugh instead of snore.” 

The rocker shook her younger sister again, “But your boy wants to show you something, come on.” 

She was normally a pretty heavy sleeper but when she was awake she was a wake. Luan had no trouble walking up to their room on her own but allowed Luna to guide her anyway to whatever it is that John wanted her to see. 

The music had longed stopped which made sense considering that Luna was the one dragging her, but there was a faint sound of a key being softly hit that repeated.

John was at his keyboard, leaning on the dash and looking a little impatient, but he straightened up when she walked into the room, “Luan! Luan you gotta check this out.” 

Was that ragtime?

It was, or at least something like it. Something that was bouncy that you could see accompanying someone walking happily in a field or at a performance at a fair. Luan stood there, but before she could make a comment the music shifted into something from the circus? She could imagine it, clowns running around, jugglers who did stunts. 

“What do you think?” He continued playing, shifting through different melodies. All of them were happy and upbeat.

“I like it.” honest and not because that was the type of of music that she preferred. 

John smiled and the music slowed down, “Great. I was working on it for a while.”

“Working on what?”

“You know how you’ve using an old stereo when you’re doing parties?” She did. It was something that she found in the attic and her computer had a cd burner so she was able to put it to good use.

“And you had to let Leni go.” Luan loved her older sister, but she was also not the most reliable of her siblings. As much as she had appreciated her help with the sets, she didn’t need an assistant that didn’t assist.

“ I was wondering that if you wanted, I could help you out. Play a few songs. Set the mood.” 

Was that what he was doing all this time? He has shown up four days a week for the last three weeks just to play with Luna. He cancelled some times that they were suppose to hang out to do so, even missed a movie that he has wanted to see. 

He just wanted to play her music?

“Of course” Luan cheered.

 

“I think your crush on my dad has gone too far.” John spoke monotone to the girl wearing a rather insulted expression. 

“Excuse me?” 

“Wait Luan, let me say that a different way.” John shook his head, “I know for a fact that your crush on my dad has gone too far.” 

“I don’t get it.” Oh if only John was telling a misunderstood joke then maybe he wouldn’t find himself as annoyed at his best (offline) friend. 

“Like I was going to let you do whatever it is you do.” John started “Like you’re my friend and It would be weird if I told you who you could like. Even if it was a annoying how you keep on walking on all his tricks on purpose.”

“Your dad is like a master of pranks.”

“He is. Not saying that It isn’t going to be good when I overthrown the old man but like the gags he does on you are things he taught me when I was a baby.” water squirting flowers, whoopie cushion and joy buzzers are great but are easily avoided when nothing creative is done with them. Luan had fallen to all of them at the hands of his father.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about John.” Luan’s voice was a bit higher than normal, sounding more like what an adult would think a kid would sound like whether then how they actually spoke.

“Hahaha” John mocked laughter, “Luan I know your lying face. You do that thing where everything sounds like five degrees more innocent than it should. I’m not going to tell my dad or something like that.”

“Fine.” Luan sighed, “I think your dad is a hunk.”

“Didn’t need you to tell me about how you think my dad looks,” John ewed, “Just could you maybe not be weird about it.”

“John, I’m not blowing anything out of proportion.” Luan rolled her eyes.

“You’re printing off pictures of your and my dad’s ‘baby.’” He made quote marks with his hands. 

Out of Luan’s printer came a picture of a perfectly generic baby wearing a hat and a bright yellow flower. 

 

“Ready for movie night?” Luan was outside of the Egbert residence some time in the afternoon. The sun was about ready to set. In the parking lot was the Loud family van with the oldest of the loud children at the helm. She was waiting to transport the two friends to the theatre destination. 

“Ya, just wait a moment. Gotta grab something.” John point his thumb at the directions of his stairs.

Luan stepped in and the door shut behind her, “Hey you know, I’ve never been in your room.”

“Dad said I’m not allowed to have girls in my room. I think it’s because I’m a preteen and he doesn’t want me to go through all that afterschool special type of deals. ‘Teen pregnancies, drugs and alcohol.”

“Dang I forgot all that heroin I have stashed away.” Luan joked. Either one of them were even sure what heroin even looked like but it was the hardest drug they knew the name of, “You have to show me around.” 

“I would but if he saw you up there he won’t be mad, he’ll be ‘disappointed.’ and he’ll give one of those sad shakes of his head.” John declined.

“Come on, your dad knows me. Any trouble I get up to will have more to do with paint bombs and saw style traps.” Luan stepped towards the stairs, “Besides I thought you were too bad to do anything but misbehave.”

Luan couldn’t understand exactly what the big deal was. John started going into her room since they were friends, starting almost four years ago. 

John nodded and for some reason Luan grew nervous. She acted like it was no big deal and she knew it was no big deal, but after so long he had finally caved. The clown girl had to wonder why exactly did her friend wait so long to reveal his domain to her.

He took and step up the stairs and paused. She took a step and did the same. John was probably waiting to see if she actually followed him. When it seems like she was that is when he fully ascended the stairs. 

“Is this it?” The two of them stopped at a door, generically white. The whole thing looked relatively normal. Just a door that was like any other door you would see in front of a kid’s room. Maybe even a bit blander. 

“Yup.” John answered and began to open his door. 

“Which one is your dad’s room?” There were other doors down the hall and it was difficult to determine which door lead to what. 

“Sorry not going to tell you.” He continued to open the door, “I haven’t even been in it and I don’t want you sneaking in for like a trophy or something.” 

“I wasn’t going to do anything like that.” There would always be another opportunity.

The door opened and Luan braced for impact. What she saw was beyond words. It was terrible. It was unimaginable. 

It was a perfectly normal room.

This whole thing was stupid. 

It was actually less than Luan was expecting. There were some draws in one corner, probably where he kept his clothing. A chest with stars in another corner and a desk with a computer right on top of it.

“Gonna find my jacket.” John slipped his hands around the star chest and popped the sucker open. The rascal rummaged through the trunk throwing behind him certain tools of treachery and trickery. Luan took a peek over his shoulder. She wondered if maybe there was some forbidden object in there that she was not met to see. 

Nope there was nothing there either, unless there was some untold importance attached to a funny hat or joke glasses that she did not know of. “Oh is that a copy of ‘Colonel Sassacre’s Daunting Text of Magical Frivolity and Practical Japery’?” 

Luan squeezed together her cheeks, “I want it! Let me borrow it please.” 

“Sure later. You lucky you have vanzilla. I think that’s the only car that could actually carry the thing” The book was gigantic, which made sense. It had all the secrets of the famous trickster, Sassacre. John moved some cards from the bottom of the box, “Maybe it’s under my bed.”

He ducked under his mattress. His sheets were ghost covers. Not surprising because of his love for spectres and the paranormal. 

Over his bed were some posters. Some of his favorite movies, she would guess. She couldn’t really make out which ones any of them were for. 

They were marked up in red and green marker, completely masking their context. The writing was messy that it was actually a bit hard for Luan to make out what it said. She squinted and tried anyway. 

Fool.

Lame kid.

There were drawing of clowns. A lot of drawing of clowns. Luan didn’t know how they got there. John absolutely hated clowns. 

“What happened to your wall?” Luan asked.

John pushed off from his bed to pop his head out. He looked straight at the poster and then another wall that didn’t have any poster nor any writing. He then looked at another wall passed the posters once again, “Where?” 

She pointed at the cluttered collage. 

“That’s just my poster of ‘Mac and Me.’ Have you ever seen it? It’s like ET but a million times better.” 

“You don’t see it?” She asked again. 

John blinked “See what?”

Luan couldn’t believe the ignorance and for a moment wondered if maybe there was really nothing. Maybe she was just seeing things. She considered maybe taking a picture of it with her cell phone. That way she could confirm it later. 

No, she didn’t really want to know if it was actually there or not.

“Hey John” She reached down and pulled the back of his shirt, “We’re keeping Lori waiting outside. Let’s go.” 

“Hold on a sec.” he remained unmoving, head under his bed.

She tugged again, “Come on, I think we got an extra jacket inside the van.” 

“But then I’d be wearing a girl’s jacket. That’ll be so lame” he whined. 

“John” she cried out his name.

“Fine, fine.” As soon as he stood up, she turned him around and started to drag him out the door. “What’s going on?”

“It’s nothing” she assured him. 

“Is this because of my Ghost Dad poster?”

  


Luan looked surprised to see him. Makes sense the two of them having really been to the same school for a while. When she was in sixth when they first met and he was in fourth. She moved up, started going to the middle school and while Luan made sure to keep in touch with all her younger friends, especially him, he did miss seeing her throughout the day. 

“Luan wanna hang out this Saturday?” He shoved an envelope in her hand.

She brought it up to eye level, trying her hardest to look through it, “What is it?’ 

John sighed, “My dad is having a party for me.”

“Thought you weren’t doing anything this year?” He wasn’t planning on it. When it came to his birthday his dad tended to go a bit overboard. Extra balloons, extra steamers, extra cake. Way too much extra cake. Fuck Betty Crocker. 

“I know. I wanted to play a new beta that was coming out. It’s suppose to come in the mail. I told a friend of mine that I’d play it with her.” He grumbled. There was always a chance that maybe he could sneak away from the party activities and get some gaming in during the afternoon. Rose had told him that she had an similar issue on her side of the country and that she was planning on doing the same. 

Luan didn’t look sure if she wanted to open up the memo but she did smile at him at least, “I’ll be there. You think I’d actually miss it?” 

“Your family is getting an invite too.” John dreading explaining this part. “Dad wanted to make this like a neighborhood get together sort of thing. Suppose to invite practically everyone over at my school too.”

John couldn’t believe how much of a extravaganza that his old man was making his birthday out to be. He really would prefer for it to be a small gathering of he and himself. At most maybe going out for pizza with his dad. 

“You dad is inviting everyone?” Luan asked. 

“Ya” he sighed

“Man, that’s going to cost him a lot.” The girl said flatly. 

“Apparently he got some cash saved up.” John shrugged, “And he’s getting some friend to help him out. Some guy who works at Skaia Net.”

“Skaia Net?” 

“Ya. You’ve heard of them?”

“Lisa keeps on going on and on about those guys. They’re the guy who make the sylladex decks, right?” Yup the storage of the future they claim. They also did other stuff or at least they claimed to. No one exactly knew what Skaia did. They existed for a long time without really making any public moves and then a couple of years ago ‘boom captachalogue cards’ 

“They’re also behind the game I really want to play.” He still couldn’t get over that, “Anyway. Apparently this friend is pulling some strings. Paying for some things, planning others.”

“That’s sounds great.” Luan smiled.

“Ya, don’t really want it, but it’s cool I guess.” John put his hands in his pocket, “Anyway everyone’s invite is coming in the mail. I just wanted to make sure you got yours so I walked over.”

“Bye.” John turned around and walked away, dodging a few of the older and larger students. 

Luan ripped a small hole in the envelope, "Hey John." 

John looked at her.

"If you want I could perform." The class clown suggested, "Put on a special show for my bestie."

Egbert smiled, "Ya that would be great. Thanks Luan"

“That your boyfriend?” said a boy that John could only assume was another high school student. 

Luan poured down the extra contents of the letter down the the kid’s shirt. 

Ha, he knew she wouldn’t fall for the itching powder.

  


Luan didn’t know what was going on. The party had been normal for a bit. Presents, balloons and a treasure trove of gifts. 

The only thing being off was the fact that cakes was baked by a solo team of Papa Egbert, who was still able to somewhat outpace the guest despite there being enough people there to populate a small village. 

There were party games en masse, a bounce house and the duo worked together in order to cause some distress in a few guest chosen at random. They made good use of John’s shiny new sylladex. An unruly instrument that cause the birthday boy a good amount of trouble but she was able to plan a few pranks with the storage that it provided for them. 

It was a good time and John was having fun. 

He grew nervous however when the mail came. It was like he was draw to the packages that were being delivered to him. He had her distract his dad as he scurried up to his room to open up a few parcels that were in his name. 

As much as she likes staring awkwardly at John’s dad (the handsome, handsome man.), she grew worried when after a while her friend did not give her a signal that he had returned downstairs.

She rushed from the man of the house briefly wondered if maybe she should go check on him. She hesitated to. She knew that she wasn’t allowed up there and she knew why she wasn’t. The graffiti that decorated her friends walls creeped her out, but not as much as his blatant ignorance of the drawings. 

Instead she waited at the bottom of the stairs for him. The two of them wouldn’t be missed on the crowded property. There were a few kids who asked her to make balloon animals for them, which she did. She was technically the clown of the party, even though John told her not to dress up as one. Unfortunately for him, there were a few friends of her that came along who had more than made up for her lack of traditional circus dresswear. 

When she did finally saw John it was after there was a large crash. It was right outside. He had ran passed her too. She followed him. He had looked a little upset.

There on his front lawn was a toilet. His toilet, she presumed. It was still attached to some flooring at it’s base but it was embedded in the hard dirt displacing the freshly cut grass. 

The guest looked at the throne that was discarded from the house and there was mild panic. Mostly adults sounding surprised and teens and kids laughing at the randomness of it. 

There were some men from Skaia there. They told everyone that they would take care of it. They had already provided some porta pottys to offset the house’s limits of only having one bathroom to begin with. 

Then the television shut off. Skaia said they would handle it again. It wasn’t too much of a lost, only some old men were watching it anyway, and that was mostly because it was by a couch that they could relax on. 

Then everyone got phone calls. Something about meteors. It was hard to make out. 

“I’m going” Her older sister held onto the arm of her oldest sister. She tried to leave through the front door.

“Like hell you are.” Luna pulled on her Lori’s arm. Lynn dragged on her feet. 

Lori had gotten a call from Bobby, there were meteors falling. The sisters were able to keep her to the front door until their parents had come to see what the commotion was about. 

They stopped her from leaving out the front door. It didn’t hurt that some ten ton machine popped in right where the entrance was. 

John came in through the backyard. How did he get there? Luan was sure that he was still upstairs in his room, doing whatever it was he was doing with the package that came in the mail. She also wasn’t expecting for him to be carrying a large ass sledge hammer. “Outta the way.” 

He stuck down on the gizmo. A light thru out, a clown toy was pulled into it and John skipped up back stairs.

Only a moment had passed when everyone had notice the mother of all comets heading it’s way to greet the household with a flaming tackle. It was only two moments until the whole neighborhood was gone except for the Egbert property and the diameter that surrounded it. 

Luan sat patiently in a cage by her lonesome. She didn’t know where her family was and she didn’t know her friends were. There were some  
‘things’ that grabbed the party guest. Black oily goblins were the best way that she could describe them. 

They separated everyone and she hoped that if anyone hadn’t escape that they were at the very least as physically okay as she was. Her arm was a bit scratched up and maybe there were a tear or two in her clothing but otherwise she was find.

She walked around her cage. There were more or those monsters outside of it. Look like this was their camp? There were some tents she could see. Though there didn’t seem to be enough for all of them out there. In fact they almost look more decorative than functional. 

The ground was blue, the grass was blue and accompanying it all were large, very blue mushroom. Where earth was she? 

She wish she had something on her. Her tools, her dummy, basically all her stuff was over at John’s house. She didn’t get a chance to grab any of it before she was stuck here. 

The monsters were all wearing jester outfits. She wish she could find the humor in getting attacked by a bunch of clowns during a birthday party, but currently she found everything frustrating. 

What was that in the distance? Woah that guy was huge. He was almost bigger than the cage and her prison was actually pretty roomy. Even if she did find a way out from behind those bars, she wasn’t sure if she could tangle with that guy.

Shit, guess the best and only thing she could was wait here for whatever those things had planned out for her. It was a perfect opportunity for a nap and after all this she was exhausted. 

It was was the sound of a lock being undone that woke her up. Luan wondered to herself if maybe that was the end. Maybe they were going to finish her off one way or another by eating her or execution. She wasn’t sure what they wanted. 

She didn’t want that. She didn’t want to just die, so when she felt a hand on her shoulder, she turned around and punched whoever it was right in the gut. 

“Ow” a familiar voice whined, “Not cool” 

“John?”

Her friend was kneeling right next to her, the door to the cage right opened. For some reason he was wearing a green suit, “Hey come on, let’s get out of here.”

“What are you doing here? Those things are outside.”

“Don’t worry about them. I have mangrit after all.” It didn’t make any sense to her but that did feel like some sort of answer. 

“Have you seen my dad?” he didn’t look worried just curious like he didn’t believe that any harm would come to his father.

It did help a little in making her feel better, “No have you seen mine? Or my mom, my sisters, my brother?” 

“No.” he replied, but she didn’t like the answer. As much as she loved her friend, any positive emotions struggled to surface in the face of the unknown fate of her family. 

He pulled her up and she let him.

“Come on” he smiled at her. “Let’s go look for them.” 

She didn’t need the support but she didn’t prevent him from holding her hand. They walked from the camp and started a journey on a new world.

**Author's Note:**

> Was thinking of making a series of these one shots. It originally was a Homestuck only idea of "what if Skaia.Net had tried to save as many people as possible by sticking them in the kids' home instead of sending them their own copies of the game". 
> 
> Crossovers are one of my favorite tags because they can really exercise the brain as you try to figure out how two pieces of work would work off on each other. It's fun to see characters who would normally never meet interact and play off each other. 
> 
> Just for fun, I believe if Luan had an aspect, her element would be Life. Life from my understanding is about enjoying life and allowing others to enjoy life.
> 
> If I continue this series than I think the next one would be a Homestuck x Gravity Falls crossover.


End file.
